20 January 2014

ruthless trust, part 4 (of 6!)

quotes and lines from chapters 6-8.  it's a lot to soak in.  

Since the Holy One is ultimately unknowable, we can only stutter and stammer about an omnipotent deity who, with effortless ease, created a star 264 trillion miles away.

Personal responsibility replaces personal response to God, and we come engrossed in our efforts to grow in holiness.

Moralism and its stepchild, legalism, pervert the character of the Christian life.

God’s distance must be complemented by his nearness.

We can no more catch a hurricane in a shrimp net or Niagara Falls in a coffee cup than we can grasp the infinity of God’s reality.

Transcendence means that God cannot be confined to the world, that he is never this rather than that, here rather than there.  Immanence, on the other hand, means that God is wholly involved with us….he is here in his mysterious nearness. 

Faith + Hope = Trust

Trust means the willingness to become absolutely empty of all terrifying and comforting images of God that we have held, so that the gift of God in Jesus Christ may come to us on God’s terms.  

…to seek the experience simply for the sake of experience is to seek self, not God.

The quiet certitude of the believer translate simply as “I know that I know that I know,” however dimly and through a glass darkly.

Every  authentic spiritual experience is an experience of unrestricted, unconditional being in Love. –Bernard Lonergan

Our trust in Jesus grows as we shift from making self-conscious efforts to be good to allowing ourselves to be loved as we are (not as we should be). 

Self-absorption fades into self-forgetfulness, as we fix our gaze on the brightness of the Lord.

Trust does not demand explanations but turns to the One who promised, “I will not leave you orphans.”

Like faith and hope, trust cannot be self-generated.  I cannot simply will myself to trust.  What outrageous irony:  the one thing I am responsible for throughout my life I cannot generate.  The one thing I need to do I cannot do. 

What does lie within my power is paying attention to the faithfulness of Jesus….pay attention to Jesus throughout my journey, remembering his kindness.

We can endure the unwanted intrusion of evil when we have experienced a theophany – an insight into the reality of go. 

…I shake my head in grateful surprise at the miracle of his grace at work in me…

honesty with others and with self is a precious commodity seldom found in either world at large or the church.

Familiarity does not exclude respect

I want a relationship with the Abba of Jesus, who is infinitely compassionate with my brokenness and at the same time an awesome, incomprehensible, and unwieldy mystery.

We should sow compassion toward our neurotic selves and our neurotic neighbors.

Don’t ever be so foolish as to measure my Father’s compassion with your compassion.  Don’t ever be so silly as to compare your thing, pallid, wavering, capricious human compassion with mine, for I am God as well as man. 

Faith God without hope in his promises is tainted trust.

Clarity, reassurance, and proof cannot create trust, sustain it or guarantee any certainty of its presence.

The 3 greatest obstacles to trust are amnesia, inertia and manana.  We are all subject to forgetfulness of God’s faithfulness in the past, laziness to act on the divine promise, and postponing until tomorrow what Jesus is asking of us today: childlike abandonment in trust.  -Edward Farrell

The most common form of presumption is the expectation that God will directly and secretly intervene in human affairs.

Trust in God does not presume that God will intervene...

16 January 2014

thursday came around rather quickly.


  • the birthday video for yaya loaded
  • celebrating such a special lady.  what a gift. 
  • when i went to move the clothes from the washer to the dryer all of the washers had finished at the same time AND all of the dryers were empty
  • spending time with 4 special fellas (1 Australian, 1 American, 1 South African & 1 Brit!) in Grade 1 last week


  • DEAR (Drop Everything And Read) day in Grade 1 (it may need to be declared a universal holiday)
  • Miss Shea (grade 1 teacher) is back!!
  • caroline sharing my coffee
  • time at the atlantic saturday...
  • solitary walks
  • making coffee in the cafe sunday morning
  • battery operated pencil sharpener!



  • lots of peaceful kids in the cabin (9 at most moments)
  • nibbles (mrs. emma's word for "snacks")
  • 1000 more gifts
  • "rejoice in the relief of being fully understood." - jesus calling
  • knowing there's a delightful coffee shop within walking distance of our old house (not that we get to enjoy it at this point....but i'm thankful to know it's there...and thankful to know that dear friends will enjoy it often!)
  • Susie's South 40 gourmet pecans.  I don't know who Susie is or even where South 40 is (somewhere in Texas...) but that lady makes some great gourmet pecans!


  • talking in kirstie's cabin
  • reading the kids version of jesus calling
  • watching eli put legos together
  • christmas card from miss catharine's family.  so special.


  • teriyaki sauce
  • the youth leaders
  • the movie i've been wanting to watch was loaded onto movie night!
  • passed the fire panel training
  • confidentiality addressed in a wonderful way
  • rainy days


  • crystal light lemonade
  • adding good books to the library's collection
  • fun little trip to the boutique with nick
  • reading what eli wrote about how he's unique
  • notes in the margin that help me remember wonderful moments
  • beautiful, ordinary moments

13 January 2014

Ruthless Trust Quotes, Part 3

moving right along...favorite quotes and snippets from Brennan Manning's "Ruthless Trust" Chapters 2-5.  (i think this may be part 3 of 5...maybe 6...we'll see).  enjoy! 

The person with an abiding spirit of gratitude is the one that trusts God. 

The foremost quality of a trusting disciple is gratefulness.  Gratitude arises from the lived perception, evaluation and acceptance of all of life as grace – as an undeserved and unearned gift from the Father’s hand.  Such recognition is itself the work of grace, and acceptance of the gift is implicitly an acknowledgement of the Giver.



 Underlying every cry of the grateful sinner is an unshaken trust in the person and promise of Jesus.

Uncontaminated trust in the revelation of Jesus allows us to breathe more freely, to dance more joyfully and to sing more gratefully about the gift of salvation.

Magnalia Dei, the marvels of God

It is simply not possible to be simultaneously grateful and resentful or full of self-pity.

…somehow a great enemy had been disarmed in her life.

Walk the way of gratefulness

He knew himself to be a man possessed totally by another, belonging totally to another, and dependent totally on another.

The grumblers live in a state of self-induced stress.

St. Benedict considered grumbling a serious offense against community life.

To be grateful for an unanswered prayer, to give thanks in a state of interior desolation, to trust in the love of God in the face of the marvels, cruel  circumstances, obscenities and commonplaces of life is to whisper a doxology in darkness.

The psalms are raw, disturbing, and brutally honest.  It is  to an angry and bewildered Job that God appears and speaks, and yet God later tells the theological sophisticate Eliphaz to ask for Job’s prayers, adding “for you have not spoken truthfully about me, as has my servant Job.”

We are, each and every one of us, insignificant people who God has called and graced to use in a significant way.  In his eyes, the high-profiles ministries are no more significant than those that draw little or no attention and publicity. 

The glory of God is the human being fully alive and the life of the human consists in beholding God.  – Iranaeus

The more we let go of our concepts and images which always limit God, the bigger God grows and the more we approach the mystery of his indefinability.

To avoid mystery is to avoid the only God worthy of worship, honor and praise.

…we become aware of innate poverty, our next-breath dependence, and a numbness that invades the roots of our littleness and realness….

The scandal of God’s silence in the most heartbreaking hours of our journey is perceived in retrospect as veiled, tender Presence and a passage into pure trust that is not at the mercy of the response it receives.

We are drawn into the ever-deepening and more direct awareness of the divine incomprehensibility.

To adore is to recognize the unfathomable greatness of God and the nothingness of the adorer.

We are not sufficient unto ourselves – we have received our life and being from another.

In the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary, somewhere deep down a Voice whispers, “All is well, and all will be well..”

Many a  believer’s perception of God is radically wrong.

As we continue to confuse our perception of ourselves with the mystery that we really are, self-rejection is inevitable.

…lift our eyes to the extravagant beauty of God manifested in creation.


See the world as a metaphor for God

10 January 2014

ruthless trust quotes, part 2

more quotes...second 1/2 of chapter 1 - pages 11 - 23  (only underlined goodness & snippets from 11 more chapters & 158 pages left to share)

uncompromising trust in the love of God inspires us to thank God for the spiritual darkness that envelopes us, for the loss of income, for the nagging arthritis that is so painful, and to pray from the heart, "Abba, into your hands i entrust my body, mind, and spirit and this entire day - morning, afternoon, evening, and night.  Whatever you want of me, I want of me, falling into you and trusting in you in the midst of my life.  into your heart i entrust my heart, feeble, distracted, insecure, uncertain. Abba, unto you i abandon myself in Jesus our Lord.  Amen.

the reality of naked trust is the life of a pilgrim who leaves what is nailed down, obvious, and secure, and walks into the unknown without any rational explanation to justify the decision or guarantee the future.  why? because God has signaled the movement and offered it his presence and his promise.

preoccupation with our past sins, present weaknesses, and character defects gets our emotions churning in self-destructive ways, closes us within the mighty citadel of self, and preempts the presence of a compassionate God.

we must allow God to see us and love us precisely as we are.

...we are seen by God with a gaze of love. 

God is loving us - you and me - this moment, just as we are and not as we should be.  there is nothing any of us can do to increase his love for us and nothing we can do to diminish it.

our trust in God's love gives God immense pleasure.

...a willingness to risk a journey into the unknown and a readiness to trust God even in the darkness is required.

...only the disciple with an unflinching trust in God will dare to risk.

i know God's goodness goes beyond all pleasure and pain - it embraces them both.

faith combined with hope grows into trust.





09 January 2014

thankful moments

  • nick getting to talk to a friend from c-town
  • the # of TAs who have become some of our very best friends
  • getting to go to congo's version of monkey joe's/cascade hills playground


  • movie marathon thursday night
  • worship sunday night
  • conversations full of questions
  • lucrech's story
  • dancing with emma
  • nick & suzanne's engagement!!
  • tuesday night plantains that are getting better & better
  • the folkers family and their time on the AFM
  • sweet saturday morning pastry/coffee outing in honor of leslie
  • hearing journey music in the dining room
  • associating aforementioned music with CCC
  • the people who understand all the abbreviations (TA/CCC/C-Town/AFM)
  • table #19 at carnivore (and the company/conversation shared there)
  • fun new notebook/journal from remy (so many possibilities)

07 January 2014

Ruthless Trust Quotes, Part 1

if you can get your hands on Brennan Manning's book "Ruthless Trust" (or any other one of Manning's books), i would recommend that you read it....if you just want to chew on some of my favorite quotes from the book, you're in the right place. (i like having them all in one place once the book goes back to the library, that's why i type them). 

This is part 1 of i'm not sure how many posts....these are the things i underlined in the preface and the first 1/2 of chapter 1 (only through page 11)....this book is so full of good stuff.



...little in their own sight, conscious of their brokenness and powerless before God, and who cast themselves on His Mercy.  Startled by the extravagant love of God, they do not require success, fame, wealth, or power to validate their worth.  Their spirit transcends all distinctions between the powerful and the powerless, educated and illiterate, billionaires and bag ladies, high-tech geeks and low-tech nerds, males and females, the circus and the sanctuary. (description of ragamuffins)

if the Lord Jesus Christ has washed me in His own blood and forgiven all my sins, i cannot and must not refuse to forgive myself.

after stumbling and falling, the ragamuffin does not sink into despondency and endless self-recrimination, she quickly repents, offers the broken moment to the Lord, and renews her trust in the Messiah of sinners.  she knows that Jesus is comfortable with broken people who remember how to love.

ragamuffins refuse to surrender control of their lives to rules and regulations.

...the sign you can trust will be the slow, steady, and miraculous transformation from self-rejection to self-acceptance rooted in the acceptance of Jesus Christ.

...trust what you have received.

the splendor of the human heart which trusts that it is loved gives God more pleasure than Westminster Cathedral, the Sistine Chapel, Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, Van Gogh's Sunflowers,  the sight of ten thousand butterflies in flight or the scent of a million orchids in bloom.

trust is our gift back to God, and He finds it so enchanting that Jesus died for the love of it.

unwavering trust is a rare and precious thing because it often demands a degree of courage that borders on the heroic.

...childlike surrender in trust is the defining spirit of authentic discipleship.

craving clarity we attempt to eliminate the risk of trusting God.

Abba, I surrender my will and my life to you without any reservation and with boundless confidence, for you are my loving Father.

self-rejection in any form is a manifest sign of a lack of trust in the total sufficiency of Jesus' saving work.  Has he set me free from fear of the Father and dislike of myself, or has he not?

unbounded trust in the merciful love of the redeeming God deals a mortal blow to skepticism, cynicism, self-condemnation, and despair.  It is our decisive YES to Christ's command "Trust in God and trust in me."

God, by definition, is thinking of me.

the God who had called him [abraham] to hope against hope was eminently reliable and the thing expected of abraham was unconditional trust.









02 January 2014

reminders of His love

  • campfire cooking
  • successful overnight camping trip
  • kids playing & running...exercising...enjoying being outside (they got more exercise before breakfast on Sunday than they often get in an entire day!)
  • reading
  • walking on the beach
  • no shoes for 30+ hours
  • no mosquito bites
  • fresh baguettes
  • nick's chicken and sauces
  • open cabins
  • beautiful christmas cards from lovely friends
  • nick's gifts to me
  • hearing nick read to our children
  • hearing about another person who has discovered "jesus calling"
  • "marvel at the beauty of a life intertwined with my presence." - jesus calling
  • how excited people get when emma smiles or waves at them
  • potato cheddar soup
  • caroline's hugs (and the fact that she often notices when i need one)
  • "oh, if only once we could be convinced of God's goodness towards His children and of His desire to reveal Himself to them." -jeanne guyon
  • cherry coke t-shirt!
  • mozzarella cheese sticks
  • "it's going to be good, really good." (words from God about 2014)
  • harry's ribbon dancing
  • emma's cubby house
  • "keep your eyes open for God, watch for His works; be alert for signs of His presence." psalm 105:4 (msg)
  • "His desire to give Himself to you is greater than your desire to lay hold of Him." -jeanne guyon